Prayer: Bending to God’s Will

Title: Praying — Bending the Will

Matthew 6:9-15

Introduction

Last week we began to look at prayer as a practice of righteousness. We made several observations. First, all people pray—from the staunch atheist to the ardent materialist. Why? Because prayers are, at their core, verbalized desires, and everyone has desires.

Not long ago, I was in conversation with an atheist who shared how deeply she longed for community and lamented the isolation she felt. If I had asked her to identify her fundamental desire, she would have said community. In that sense, she was praying for community.

Second, we are always praying because we are always desiring. Every time we begin a sentence with the words, “I wish…” we are praying. We are verbalizing our desires. We are expressing how we want our world to be. I wish traffic weren’t so bad. I wish I had a better relationship with a family member. These are desires for a world that, in our eyes, would be as it should be. I wish our politicians would just operate with common sense. (And if you do pray that, just make sure you’re sitting down, because it might take a while.) But I digress. Prayers are verbalized desires.

This is important because the reason we often fail to pray is not because we don’t have time, or because we don’t know how to make requests, or because we have no needs. Rather, it is because we often fail to see what prayer is doing in our lives. We don’t pray to inform God—as if He were unaware. We don’t present our case to Him like lawyers trying to convince Him to help. So the honest question that should come to mind is: then why pray?

If God is going to do whatever He wants—and if He has already determined His purposes—and if we can’t convince Him to act in a particular way, then why pray? It can seem like a waste of time. Why not just live my life, let God do what He wants to do, and I’ll do what I need to do?

I was talking with my wife about this very question last week. We were reflecting on the pain of not being able to have children because it was not God’s plan for us, while hearing stories like that of a mother who tortured her daughter to death. It seems unfair. In those moments, prayer feels unnecessary. If God is going to do what He wants anyway, why bother? Because prayer has far more to do with the reformation of our desires than with our requests being answered.

Consider the man who, after Jesus, probably suffered the most in the Bible—Job. The entire book is a prolonged conversation, essentially a long prayer, in which Job repeatedly asks, “What is going on?” I did everything right. I followed the rules. Yet this is my reward? This is unjust. He expresses his disappointments—both with God and with his circumstances. How does the book end? Not with God explaining the reasons for Job’s suffering, but with Job bending his will to God’s.

Prayer has more to do with what God is doing in our hearts—at the level of desire.

So the question becomes: what is God doing in us through prayer? The answer Christ gives in this model prayer is this: Prayer is the vehicle by which our will is bent to God’s will. Or, to put it another way, prayer is the means God uses to reform our desires.

And He bends our wills in two ways:

1. By teaching us to desire God.
2. By developing our dependence on Him.

First: Desiring God

We must first observe that this prayer is called a model prayer because it gives us the categories by which we should pray—categories through which God bends our wills toward Him. And the reason God bends our wills toward Him is because that is when we experience the greatest joy. I will never tire of saying this truth: God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him. That’s a quote from Pastor John Piper, who rightly understands that our joy and God’s glory are not mutually exclusive. And so the first thing God teaches us in this prayer is to desire God.

If we look at the first three petitions of the Lord’s Prayer, we see that they all revolve around this theme. The way God bends our wills—reforms our desires—is by teaching us to pray that our desire for Him would increase. Jesus shows us how to verbalize our desires in prayer so that our desires are reshaped, reordered, and aimed at Him.

Recall again the illustration from last week: as a woodworker applies the pressure of a chisel to shape a piece of wood, so prayer acts upon our souls. Genuine, sincere prayer is to our desires what a chisel is to a block of wood; it reforms, shapes, and reshapes the heart after the image of God.

How do we learn to desire God? Jesus gives us four ways.

1. Desire God as Your Father

“Our Father in heaven…”

Jesus begins the model prayer by teaching us to address God not merely as the All-Powerful One, not merely as the Mighty One, not merely as the Holy One, but as our Father. One of the most neglected doctrines in the Christian church—and in our broader culture—is the fatherhood of God. We rarely stop to ponder what it means that we are God’s children. And our failure to ponder God’s fatherhood shows up in our lives.

Illustration:
Not long ago I encountered an extremely difficult and painful situation involving family—something I never imagined would happen in my lifetime. When I first learned of it, my immediate instinct was not to pray. My instinct was, What do I need to do?

Like a good American, raised from childhood to believe, I can do anything I set my mind to, I immediately tried to solve the problem by sheer will. And in doing so, I forfeited the blessing that is uniquely ours as Christians: having God as our Father.

I believe prayerlessness often stems from not understanding the communion we have with God as Father. When you read the Gospels, you repeatedly see Jesus praying, because communication is natural between a father and a son. Conversation—questions, thoughts, emotions, requests, gratitude—flows naturally in a family.

Jesus tells us we may call God Father because He, the true Son, makes that relationship possible. When we think of the gospel, we often think first of the benefits—justification, sanctification, glorification. But the gospel is not primarily what we get. The gospel is Christ Himself. When we get Christ, we get all the benefits—but nothing is separated from Him.

And by receiving Christ, we receive the Son of God—and with Him, we become sons and daughters of the Most High. Therefore, the first way we desire God is by calling upon Him as Father.

But can you truly call God “Father”? Many of us have had difficult experiences with our earthly fathers—cruel, indifferent, aloof, emotionally detached. And we project those images onto God. But the Christian life is not Jesus trying to convince the Father to love you. Nor does God love you because Jesus died for you. That flips the gospel.

The truth is this: Jesus died for you because God loves you.
It is God’s eternal love for His chosen children that brought about the redeeming work of Christ.

So Jesus teaches us to address God as our Father—the One we call Abba, the One we approach in the power of the Spirit as our gracious heavenly Father.

2. Desire God by Delighting in His Glory

“Hallowed be Thy name.”

The second way our desire for God is shaped is by praying that God’s name would be hallowed—glorified, esteemed as holy. Holy here means not only set apart but righteous, good, sound, undefiled, and just.

Many think this line is simply praise. But Jesus frames it as a request:
Father, cause Your name to be magnified, honored, and revered.

In Scripture, a name represents both identity and character. Nabal is a classic example—his name means “fool,” and his behavior matches it. His very name carried the weight of his character.

So when Jesus teaches us to request that God’s name be hallowed, He is teaching us to desire God’s glory. And when our desires are aligned with God’s glory, we find maximum joy.

3. Desire God by Rejoicing in His Rule

“Your kingdom come.”

This petition does look forward to the future manifestation of God’s kingdom on earth. But it also has a present fulfillment. When we pray, “Your kingdom come,” we are asking God to rule in our hearts—to exercise His sovereign authority over our desires.

Remember: the sin of Adam and Eve was fundamentally a rejection of God’s rule. It was a declaration: I don’t want God to rule; I want to rule.

So when we pray, “Your kingdom come,” we are expressing desire for God’s rule and rejoicing in His governance over every part of our lives.

4. Desire God by Delighting in the Prosperity of His Governance

“Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.”

This petition goes further. It is not only a request for God to rule, but for God’s rule to prosper—for His will to be obeyed joyfully and unhindered. A king may rule, but his subjects may rebel. This prayer asks that God’s will would flourish, that His governance would not be resisted.

And once again, this is a matter of the heart. What needs to change most in our lives is not how many Bible verses we read or songs we sing or prayers we offer. The fundamental change is this: we must desire God.
We must desire His rule, His wisdom, His goodness—so that when He commands something that feels contrary to our own happiness, we would still delight in His will, not merely obey it reluctantly.

We must keep in mind: the glory of God is not opposed to our happiness. Our happiness is tied to God’s glory. Where God’s name is glorified, we experience true, lasting joy.

David was disciplined because he caused the nations to blaspheme God’s name. Jesus is teaching us here that our wills are bent—our desires are reshaped—to glorify God’s name by desiring Him: as Father, in His glory, in His rule, and in the flourishing of His governance.

Now we move to the second half of the prayer, which teaches us about developing dependence.

Second: Developing Dependence

Physical Dependence

“Give us this day our daily bread.”

It is significant that the second half of the Lord’s Prayer begins with the request: “Give us this day our daily bread.” Jesus assumes this petition will be made daily. What is being formed here is a rhythm of daily dependence—a posture in which we look to God continually and consciously for our needs.

This immediately recalls Israel’s experience with manna. God provided manna every day as they journeyed from Egypt to the Promised Land.

I have often asked myself: Why does Jesus place this petition before the request for forgiveness? It would seem that spiritual help is more fundamental than physical sustenance. So why begin with daily bread?

I believe the answer is this: this petition is a necessary prerequisite for the next ones—the forgiveness of sins and deliverance from the evil one. If we are not living in dependence on God—if our posture is not one of humility and reliance—then asking for forgiveness or protection cannot come from a sincere heart.

These petitions must not be separated from the Beatitudes. The Beatitude most directly tied to this posture is meekness. Meekness is a dependent spirit, and meekness is necessary if we are to pray in a way that is heard.

A hypocrite is not meek because he is self-sufficient.
A babbler is not meek because he seeks to control and assert his own will.

Who, then, is heard on high?
The one who comes in submissive dependence.
This is why the first request of the second half is: “Give us this day our daily bread.”

God kept Israel dependent by requiring them to gather manna daily—not weekly, monthly, or yearly. He even forbade them from storing more than a day’s worth (except before the Sabbath). His provision was intentionally daily because daily provision creates daily dependence.

We live in perhaps the most prosperous nation in the history of the world. Many of us have food stored for weeks or even months. This abundance subtly produces independence. Think about it: How often do we actually pray for daily sustenance?

Jesus commands us to pray for daily bread because doing so develops a habit of dependence. Independence from God is the greatest evidence of sin. Separation from God is the essence of sin. And so prayer trains the heart back into dependence.

We can say it another way:
If we do not recognize our dependence on God for daily bread—something visible and tangible—we will never recognize our dependence on Him for spiritual needs, which are invisible.

Thus, physical dependence prepares the heart for spiritual dependence.

Spiritual Dependence

Spiritual dependence appears in two requests:

1. The forgiveness of sins
2. Protection from the evil one

1. Dependence on God’s Mercy

“Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.”

Here we acknowledge our deep need for God’s mercy, compassion, and cleansing. But notice that this request flows naturally from the previous one. If we have learned to depend on God for daily provision, we will more readily depend on Him for daily forgiveness.

Yet we often fail to do this. We rarely think about our sin. We excuse it. We grow desensitized to its seriousness and to the offense it is before God. And when we cease to ask for forgiveness, we train ourselves to live independently from God.

2. Dependence on God’s Protection

“Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.”

We often sing A Mighty Fortress Is Our God, which reminds us:

For still our ancient foe
doth seek to work us woe;
his craft and power are great,
and armed with cruel hate,
on earth is not his equal.

This “ancient foe,” filled with cruel hate, seeks our destruction. In essence, this petition asks God not to place us in the same situation in which He placed His Son—face-to-face with the Evil One. Christ triumphed; we would surely fail in our weakness. So we ask God to deliver, rescue, and guard us.

But in a society saturated with materialism, we rarely meditate on the presence and work of the devil. We operate almost entirely in the physical realm and neglect the spiritual. This neglect is spiritually devastating. No wonder we are not compelled to pray—we forget the spiritual battle altogether.

Paul reminds us that our battle is not against flesh and blood but against spiritual forces of wickedness. Ignoring this reality removes any sense of dependence on God’s protection.

Praying to Be Heard

In this portion of the Sermon on the Mount, we have been exploring how to pray in a way that we are heard. Everyone prays. Everyone places their faith in something. But how do citizens of the Kingdom of Heaven pray?

We do not pray like hypocrites—seeking applause.
We do not pray like babblers—seeking control.
We pray as those whose wills are being bent toward God.

But how do we know our wills truly are being bent?
What is the evidence that our hearts are being conformed to Christ?

Jesus gives the answer in Matthew 6:14–15.

Of all the petitions in the Lord’s Prayer, Jesus comments on only one—the petition about forgiveness. Why? Because forgiveness is the clearest evidence that our wills are aligned with God’s.

He says:

If you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
But if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

Jesus is teaching that the evidence of desiring God—the evidence of a bent will—is love and mercy extended to others.

This is why Jesus said the world will know we are His disciples not by how we pray, preach, evangelize, structure worship, or uphold the Three Forms of Unity, but by how we love one another.

Paul says the same in 1 Corinthians 13. You may speak in tongues, possess prophetic power, understand mysteries, possess all knowledge, have enough faith to move mountains—but without love you are nothing and gain nothing.

Love is not a feeling.
Love is action.

It is patient, kind, not envious or boastful, not arrogant or rude.
It does not insist on its own way.
It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

The clearest evidence that prayer is shaping our lives is our ability to forgive. That is why Jesus says, if you remember someone has something against you while offering your gift, first be reconciled.

True piety—true righteousness—is not merely external action; it is evidenced in extending mercy, compassion, and forgiveness.

Because God is love.

John says the same:
If you do not love, you do not know God.
We should not be like Cain, who murdered his brother because his deeds were evil.
Practicing righteousness is practicing love.

John writes:
“Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another… If we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us.”

God’s love is made manifest through our love for one another.

The entire prayer uses plural pronouns—our Father, our daily bread, our debts. This indicates that prayer is communal. Love for one another is the most visible expression of a will bent toward God.

Application

How do we pray to be heard?

1. Remember Your Identity – Children of God

When you pray, do not pray to show off.
Do not pray to convince or manipulate God.
Pray as a child who desires God, who delights in God.

Pray as one who belongs to God—an heir of God and a co-heir with Christ.
This identity shapes the posture of our hearts as we approach Him.

2. Remember the Purpose of Prayer – The Reformation of Our Desires

When you pray, remember that the fundamental purpose of prayer is the reformation of our desires—the bending of our will toward God.

Join our prayers Sundays and Wednesdays.

When our wills are bent and our desires are directed heavenward, we discover true joy. Prayer is designed to turn our will toward God, and when our will is aligned with His, we find lasting joy in Him.

Conclusion

This morning we learned that everyone prays. The question is: Who is heard?

The answer Scripture gives is this:
Those who are heard are those whose wills are bent toward God—those who allow their desires to be reformed according to God’s purposes.

So as we approach prayer, may it be that we refuse to pray for show.
May we refuse to pray for control.
Instead, may we pray knowing that our wills and desires are being reshaped, our hearts are being turned toward God, and in that transformation we experience true and lasting joy—joy that surpasses all understanding.

Pray in such a way that your will bends not toward yourself, but toward God—and that your desires follow Him.